Friends are the Flowers…

…in the garden of life, and I’m very thankful for the few I’ve been blessed with. 😊

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Thank you Lord, for every friend you’ve brought along my way

Equally for the ones who’ve gone, as well the ones who stay.

For every friend who’s shared my life in some way or another

Has blessed the time we have enjoyed, and the path we’ve trod together.

(c) 2020 June 24

Ten Reasons to Pray, from Truth2Freedom’s Blog.

Just wanted to share something beautiful for a change. There is so much garbage happening around us all the time now, that we need to take time to pray and be holy.  I can’t think of any better reason to pray than to keep ourselves under the peaceful shadow of the Almighty in this age of manufactured fear.

https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/410412/posts/2730606421

Hope this blessed you. 🙂

 

Disney the Devil-Channel

Who hasn’t grown up on Disney movies and stories? Who hasn’t loved the oh-so-cute fairy godmother of Cinderella, not to mention the funny dragon ancestor-spirit of Mulan? Who hasn’t been totally deceived by the innocent-looking Disney cartoons?

Almost nobody, from my parents’ generation onwards, including myself. How could you NOT love these absolutely cutsie-pie creatures who always came to make life a little easier for their favoured one? After all, they were GOOD — weren’t they?

Recently, I and my best half were discussing the sneaky, underhanded way in which Disney has deceived almost all of us into thinking that devils and demons were good, loving entities; and how most parents in their ignorance, keep perpetuating the idea by allowing their own children to watch all the Disney “latest”. (Sigh! Including myself.)

But this is a serious WARNING to all parents, especially parents claiming to be Christians: please take the time to cnsider what you are allowing into your child’s spirit. From http://www.leftcult.com, is this very timely warning about Disney’s “latest”, but it should give you pause for thought about ALL that came before, from generations back. Disney is just getting bolder and more blatant today, now that they have so many nostalgia-loving followers…

https://leftcult.com/2020-01-14-disney-promoting-demons-witchcraft-children.html

Has anybody noticed that most Disney stories also promote rebellion against proper, God-given parental authority; something the Bible calls witchcraft, as well. Does anybody care??  Will anybody take this as seriously as it requires, to protect their children from further indoctrination into devil culture??

May God have mercy on our former ignorance, and give us all grace to repent and turn from this evil called “Disney” (and all TV programming, by the way)!!

 

 

Being A Little Boy’s Mama – The Real Life Version — Hommunism News

(source) I am bringing this back for a third time, due to what I consider to be an assault on men in America today. We mamas of little boys have a tough job. You are exhorted to have lots of energy, be ready to put up with bloody noses and reptiles in the house, see movies […]

via Being A Little Boy’s Mama – The Real Life Version — Hommunism News

Amen, and AMEN!!! What more can I say? I agree 100%+!!

All women need to read this. The world desperately needs more REAL MEN!! And real women who can love them for WHO THEY ARE.

Thoughts on Death…

Yesterday, I learned that my critically ill and estranged father was dying. As a professing born again Christian, he has for years been using his internet page to assassinate my character, and that of my best half, blaming us for his “having” to post such calumnious content; therefore, the estrangement.

At the same time, he continually claimed he was waiting for me to “make things right” with him, posting such things as would encourage outsiders to think he really loved me, and wanted me to “be reconciled”. But the truth is, he only wanted me to turn back into the sin I had confessed, repented of, and forsaken years ago, which I simply cannot do, not even for a relationship with my parents.

“He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me…” (Jesus)

So today my son, best half and I drove up to see him at the hospital, with another strong message from the Lord for him to repent, which he didn’t know I had; neither did he know I was coming to visit. So when I (alone) appeared in front of his deathbed, before I said one word; instead of welcoming me, as his internet postings would have indicated, he bluntly asked me, “What are YOU doing here?” in a tone which clearly indicated that I was definitely NOT the person he wanted to see just then.

So I plunged immediately into my reason for appearing; he listened quietly, completely unmoved by the message or my quaking voice, thanked me for the message, asked if my best half was with me, and upon learning the affirmative (my dad hates my best half because my dad hates the true gospel), he told me I could leave.

Which brings me to my thoughts on death.

How can such obviously willfully sinning professing Christians die thinking they are in no need of repentance? How can they face God with such a defiled conscience?? I have witnessed a very God-fearing man on his deathbed who felt the need to repent in the face of death, who really had not much to repent of!! But such deceived persons who sin WILLFULLY (that means they KNOW it’s sin, but do it anyways!) can face the judgment of God unmoved by any fear!!

The bible says that “because they received not a love of the truth, God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie.” He sure believed a big fat lie!

He kept the paper I had written my message on; not, I fear, to reread and ponder the path of his feet; but more likely, I suspect, to show others and twist it all to make it appear that I am such a mean daughter, coming there to see him on his deathbed with no comfort, only words of “condemnation”… It has been the case for years with every loving thing I’ve told him, trying to get him to consider the state of his soul…

Nope. He “believes”, therefore his soul is eternally “secure”, no matter how much evil he is still doing right up until the point of death! This utterly false PERNICIOUS* doctrine from Satan himself has turned many a soul away from the truth of confession, repentance, and a forsaking of all known and willful sinning by the grace and power of Jesus Christ (the true gospel).

*PERNICIOUS: Having the quality of killing. (Webter’s 1828 Dictionary of the American Language)

So was I mean to warn him of his danger while he lay there helplessly on his deathbed, where he couldn’t bully me (for a change)? Was I mean to offer him — from the Lord — one more chance to repent before he died?

The Lord gave me one thought all the way home:

A call to repentance; the most loving thing you can do.

Yes…

Let others think what they will!

 

Domestic Abuse: A Man’s Story

A Man’s Perspective on Being Abused

Since October is apparently “Domestic Abuse Awareness Month”, and since one of my readers suggested I write an article on men who get abused, I thought that was an excellent idea because, while it may not be as common an occurrence as it is for women, it does happen. And men need to be heard, too.

I interviewed a man in his senior years, who has had the misfortune to have been married to three abusive women. As all three were, apparently, very similar in their abusiveness, I have taken the sum of the interview as a whole, and have compiled a type of composite woman to refer to as “she”, for your easier understanding. Here is his courageous story.

“The rages were always sudden and unexpected. I never knew what had occurred to cause them. I can’t recall any arguments or fights happening prior to these sudden, evil rages.

We were happy much of the time. But every once in awhile, she would blow up and begin to call me evil names, saying how wicked I was, when even just a moment before, she might have been telling me how much she loved me! She would scream and rage uncontrollably, sometimes trying to hurt me, and threatening to leave me, or even kill me! Once she hit me in the face so hard, she broke open my cheek. And once, she lacerated my hands with a set of keys. And sometimes she would throw things at me. Her tongue lashings were brutal.

I made really good money at my trade, but it never seemed to be enough. It seemed I was always in debt, usually back taxes and unpaid bills. This was owing to the fact that she would either be gambling away the money, or out shopping and partying with her friends, while I was at work. Our house was overflowing with antiques and things we didn’t need, or have room for, but there was no way I could stop her from spending us out of house and home. There were a couple of occasions where I actually had to sell our house or the equipment to pay off the debts. She wouldn’t even make lunch for me, when I was working long hours to supply her wants!

Once the kids got older, things got worse. She would undermine my authority by teaching them to rebel against me, giving them whatever they wanted, to keep them on her side. If I tried to address the financial problems we were facing, they would all gang up on me. Usually, she would turn everything around on me whenever I tried to talk about any of our problems, until I couldn’t speak of them at all.

She didn’t care about anything I owned. She would let the kids and their boyfriends drive my cars while I was at work, not caring if they dinted them or broke off the door handles. This was very discouraging.

But the lying- wow! She lied about me to everybody behind my back, and I began to wonder why my friends wouldn’t come around to see me anymore. I would come home unexpectedly from work, and find her partying with other men. You couldn’t pin her down on anything!

But the good times we had kept me hoping things would be better this time. I would think, ‘Maybe this time she will tell me all the bills are paid.’ (One big problem I had, is that I was illiterate, so she took care of the bills, or was supposed to, but didn’t. If I could have been able to read, perhaps things might have been different, at least on the financial end.)”

When I asked him how all this made him feel, this is what he said:

“It was really confusing; and I was stunned. Stunned, because the rages would come so suddenly out of nowhere, and I was left standing there being cut to shreds with her words, not having a clue what I had done to cause this behaviour.

I was ashamed, too, because my own family didn’t like her, and would avoid us, even though they came to visit my brother on the same yard. I never thought about being angry, but it was very confusing.”

When asked if he felt afraid, he answered, “No, not afraid, because I knew I could handle her if she got violent.”

Did you ever think of leaving? “No, because we had children, and I believe in commitment. But there was one time in winter, just before I got converted, when I was determined to head north until I ran out of food and gas, and walk north until I starved to death. I was that tired of the whole mess. But the Lord had mercy on me.

Oh! I have to tell you that after I became a born again Christian — that was a miracle in itself — the abuse increased dramatically. She even tried to kill me with a butcher knife, and one night I heard her rattling the guns in the gun case. Still, I was not afraid. The Lord kept me in perfect peace.”

When I asked him if he had ever tried to get help, he replied, “No, I never thought of her behaviour as abuse because I didn’t understand it. But a man doesn’t talk about such things, anyways, usually, he just handles it the best way he knows how. I suppose if I could have talked with someone, I might have been able to get help. Besides, I never EVER would have thought of saying that she was abusing me. That was just the way things were.

She told me much later, when she divorced me on false grounds, that she was deliberately trying to ruin me financially. She sued me and had the courts take away my livelihood, my shop, and everything, right near retirement, when it was too late for me to begin again.”

So why didn’t you get help from the church, now that you were a Christian? Here is his sad answer.
“The church actually helped her in wrongdoing. [This was with the last two wives, who professed to be Christians.] She was able to falsely accuse me without anybody from the church coming to see me, and find out what was really going on. They encouraged her to divorce me, and even sue me, even though that is totally against the word of God!”

So what would you tell other men who may have similar experiences with their wives?

“When I had gone for counselling, they had insisted I read a book called “Walking on Eggshells”, which greatly helped me understand this behaviour. These women all suffered from what is called, “borderline personality disorder”, a term used to describe someone who has “emotional hemophilia”. It comes from having been abused as a child, and is their way of dealing with their inability to receive love. It is also sometimes called “crazy-making disease”, and that is completely accurate! Sometimes I felt like I was going crazy!”

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Not very many men will be that forthright about their experiences, and I can understand why. A man wants to appear strong and in control, and admitting that he has been the victim of abuse by a woman is rather humbling, and can seem a bit weak. But I believe their stories need to be told, too, so I am encouraging my readers to tell me their stories.

Awareness of domestic abuse of all kinds is a necessary step to helping put an end to it.

“I felt so damaged & broken hearted” — JoyfulSurrender.com

Not everyone understands domestic violence. People are quick to say I would never accept that behavior, but they have never experienced the subtle mind games they play. They keep you so confused you don’t even realize what is happening until after you’ve been sucked in.

via “I felt so damaged & broken hearted” — JoyfulSurrender.com

In order to help my readers better understand domestic violence, I have shared this woman’s story.

Many people will judge a woman wrongly in such cases, when they have never experienced this type of mind control. (Even if they have, they can judge wrongly, if they still believe women are expected to submit to everything a man does…).

Be encouraged. There IS help, and the Lord will lead you to it, if you are willing to trust him for the courage and strength to step out and embrace it.

I and my best half have written a small book which addresses the so-called “church’s” part in helping to enable the abuser by their false teachings on submission. We are willing to share this book with any who are suffering abuse, and would like to read it, and learn what God really means when he talks about submission. Simply message me here at this blog with your address, and we will send you one free.

 

With an Abuser, Nothing is Off Limits — JoyfulSurrender.com

In honor of Domestic Violence Awareness Month (October), I asked the ladies in our online group to share their stories and the challenges and difficulties they faced while in their abusive situations. Here’ the first in a series. Many thanks to this dear woman for taking the time to write this. Please pray for her […]

via With an Abuser, Nothing is Off Limits — JoyfulSurrender.com

In sympathy with all the women who suffer in silence, not knowing where to get help.

In honour of all the women who have found the courage to break free from this pernicious cycle that destroys them from within.

In honour of all the men who reject abusiveness, and choose instead to love and respect their wives, cherishing them as they promised to do…

And mostly, I desire to honour and glorify the Lord, whose name is exalted above the heavens!!

Ugly Truth — Not So Random Words

This post is not going to be pretty. It will ruffle feathers. It will also be terribly long. Some will say I’m wrong for airing our laundry out in the streets. If you follow this blog in any capacity, you will know transparency is what I’m all about. Quite frankly, I don’t like secrets. They […]

via Ugly Truth — Not So Random Words

Parents, be warned. Don’t be so naive. Know that these things can and do happen. Even by their own family members, as happened to my own sons. Don’t be so cowardly or selfish that you won’t get help if you know what is happening.

I grieve at this mother’s story. It happened much worse to my own chihldren, but I didn’t find out until it was too late. We all pray it won’t happen to our own children, but it can, and sometimes does. So quit hiding your heads, and stop thinking your children are better than others. I found out truth the hard way.

BE VIGILANT!!

Why am I so Confused? A Look at Non-violent Abuse.

“Why am I so confused? Why does it seem like I am the only one to blame for everything? Am I really that bad of a person?” she asked herself.

She tried to do better; tried to please him as much as possible in every detail. She forced herself to submit to every demand, however unjust, so she could be a “good Christian wife”.

But nothing helped. He got more demanding, more implacable as time went on. The usual cold shoulder silent treatment with which he punished her was so hostile, she could feel the lightning bolts strike her heart with deadly intensity.

By the time she had been married three years, she was sure of her mistake. But she was a Christian, and didn’t believe in divorce…

Her child was born with a medical problem that put it immediately into NICU. The postpartum depression (baby blues) had hit her pretty hard, and having the baby an hour away in NICU was very difficult, emotionally and physically. The daily drive to see him was dreadfully tiring, but when the nurses offered her a room so she could stay with her baby, her husband denied it to her; he “needed her at home”, etc., etc.

What was even worse, was that for some unknown reason — again — that hostile silence had been for days brooding over her head. She suspected it was because she didn’t “feel like it” after just giving birth, but, as usual, he wouldn’t say. She just suffered…

At this time, they were expecting company, and the hour of visitors approached. She knew what would happen, and sure enough, about the time they drove up the drive, he had switched into what she called his “sickeningly sweet mode”. He became — as is common for abusers — a most attentive, loving husband, always ready to serve her. It sickened her, because she knew that if she tried to say even one word about how he treated her up to two minutes before their arrival, she would look like an ungrateful, whiny complainer. After all, “look how GOOD he treats her! Wish MY husband was that nice! What a loser!!”

And, true to form, the minute their visit was over, he returned to his hostile silent treatment.

There was no fight, no screaming. There was some attempt by her to try to figure out what she had done. There was a plea to attend that marriage seminar coming up, which they had mentioned as being helpful to relationships. But he claimed HE had no need of that conference, and if there was a problem, it was HER who had the problem, shutting her down again.

She couldn’t see what was wrong; she could only feel it. And how do you describe a feeling of indefinable oppression, when at every turn he looked so good to others? After all, he was a good provider; and he didn’t physically beat her…

So, WHAT WAS WRONG?? It really did appear that she was just a bad person, and her temper outbursts didn’t help that appearance. But an indescribable something was provoking her, and try as she might, she couldn’t stop having outbursts. In fact, they kept getting worse…

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This is one look at abuse that can’t be seen with the untrained eye. There are no bruises, at least not outward ones. There is really nothing to SEE, therefore those suffering from this type of abuse can be the most confused and self-blaming of all. The abuser’s secret manipulation of emotions and mental faculties creates incredible insecurity and self-doubt.

This happens in the churches as surely as out. The marriage counselling they offer — IF the abuser will even attend — is not capable of dealing with abuse, simply because an abuser (male or female) is a master at looking good, while making the other party look bad. (Not that it’s very hard to make an emotional basket case look bad…!)

And one thing being taught in many churches is that the wife is to submit to her husband, no matter what. This contributes to the incidence of hidden abuse. Another teaching contributing to this ugly fact is that many believers are taught that God hates and condemns ALL divorce, regardless of circumstances. Both these teachings permit abuse to continue. Both are half truths, which are pernicious and dangerous.

My husband and I have addressed this issue in a book, which we hope will help both men and women understand what true biblical submission is. If you are interested, please contact me via this blog, and we can arrange how to get a book to you.